Just beginning.........

Attempting to create a new blog on my IPad has proved itself harder than on the standard computer! Am so frustrated need to take a "time out!" 

 The smallest of things can trigger the mood for the day.  It may seem petty to others but it can be a huge obstacle in your head for the whole day!  Explaining this to those around you on a regular basis feels vulnerable and somewhat impossible.  Then the anxiety is allowed to creep in until the problem is resolved.  Trouble being you don't want to bring up the bad from the beginning of the day at the end of the day.....

Calming ones self without a benzo for immediate relief  can be a huge new challenge.  I have just been given Vistaril for anxiety and have yet to feel any effect other than tiredness.  Letting go of my of my Xanax is like losing a best friend.  It makes me angry at the world that I can't stay on them long term.  I figure why else does the drug company make them?    Even though I am repeatedly told that long-term use is not a good thing.  I'm pissed at the events of the day and angry at those who are able to have a drink to relieve their tension.  I know this too shall pass but, meanwhile.......

Is trusting the professional in charge of your medication supposed to be this difficult or am I jaded?